I am a woman. I like to get dressed up when I go out. I wear tight clothes, heels, makeup, I do my hair really pretty. I get with my girls, and we go out to have a good time. That isn’t an invitation for a guy to have his way with me.
I’ve had conversations with friends, conversations with police officers, and now I am watching this documentary on Netflix, and I am baffled at how people blame the victim for being raped. “She wore a tight, short skirt”; “she was by herself in the alley”; “she was drunk and all over him”. No matter what “she was”, no one asks to be violated. No one asks to be taken advantage of. There is never a reason for a man to use his strength, power, and control to overpower a woman and rape her. It’s not our fault. We can wear whatever we want- that doesn’t mean that we want it. I’ve had too many conversations with men who say that women ask for it when put in a compromising situation. Think about it- whenever a female says she’s been raped, the very first questions asked are “how do you know you’ve been raped”, or “what were you doing?”, “what did you have on?” What I wore doesn’t qualify me as a candidate for being raped. Me drinking shouldn’t make me a contender for being raped, nor justify someone taking advantage of me. And I have to prove, aside from the bruises and tears on my vagina and or asshole, that someone did something to me that I didn’t ask for? Now- let’s take a breathe and admit that there are women who lie about being raped for whatever reason they do so. I am in no way justifying or condoning that. But for ACTUAL rape survivors- why is being a female automatically the reason why we are raped?! If I do not openly say yes, it’s rape. That means don’t kiss me, touch me, finger me, fuck me, nothing. If I’m drunk, let me be drunk. If I’m high, let me ride my cloud. I shouldn’t have to cover up or wear baggy clothes or not be at a party alone because a man doesn’t know how to control himself. I am not your toy. What saddens me is that other females will shame a rape survivor rather than go to her defense. Another woman will quickly blame a rape survivor for being raped- like the exact same thing couldn’t happen to them!
I have a rather large behind and large lips. I hate going out because of it. The stares, the gropes, the sexual advances. I was told that I had “dick sucking lips” all throughout high school. So yeah, I believe that I could easily go out at night and have something happen to me. Because in a room full of people and cameras, men still make unwanted advances. At this point, I’m thinking thank goodness that I am not a drinker and I don’t go out alone. I don’t believe that any woman should ever be raped (and yes- that includes transgender and homosexual people as well). Getting someone to sleep with you in this day and age is extremely too easy. There’s no reason anymore why anyone should feel the need to “take it”. I’m not going to change my clothes, I’m not going to button up my shirt, I’m not going to not drink. Men need to learn that NO means NO! Not maybe, not in a few, not after another drink. NO!
As always, be legendary KINGS; be extraordinary QUEENS!