Being A Lady!

As a child, I used to love reading books. Even into my adulthood, I chose to read rather than watch tv. I’m currently reading a book called “Gentlewoman” by Enitan O. Bereola II. It’s a man’s interpretation of what a Lady should be. And it got me to thinking.

I think we in the 21st century have forgotten what it is to be an actual LADY! We are so concerned with what society wants us to be, what our men want us to be, what our children want us to be, and what we have come to make ourself. And we have forgotten and neglected what makes us a woman. I know at some point that I have. It’s funny, because as I am reshaping my ideology of who I am, what I want, and who I want to end up with, I find this book. Maybe this is God’s way of saying “you’re on the right path baby girl”.

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like females are forced into this BOX and have a hard way of being individualized into actual people. We have to be successful because we are undervalued at work (when in all actuality we work harder than our male co-workers), we have to raise our children with little to no help from their fathers, and we have to upkeep our appearance because men want something pretty to look at and keep on their arm. Which is why I refuse to wear make up. You’re either gonna love me and my adult acne and oily skin, and my 2-cesarian-section-baby-belly, or you can find someone else to bother. Either way, it makes me no nevermind.

What is a lady? Websters says that it’s a woman of superior social status. So does that mean that someone of my social status can’t be a lady? Because I have absolutely no social life. And my bank account doesn’t exactly match a high-social-status-life either. How can I be a lady, and what does being a lady look like/reflect? It would be completely easy to say that it varies per person, but that isn’t true. Just like there is an across-the-board expectation of being a mother, a wife, and a good friend, there is a set expectation of being a lady. Whether or not you want to follow that guideline is a different story…

I’m still learning what it means to be a lady, just like I’m still learning who I am and what I want out of life (though, some chocolate cake with fudge icing would definitely help put me at peace right now). I do know that I want to possess certain qualities like being kind, polite, intelligent, sexy (NOT SLUTTY!! I realize that today’s generation make the two interchangeable and they are not! You can be sexy fully dressed; try it. It may warrant you the POSITIVE attention that you have been looking for ladies!), humble yet dominant, and I want to be memorable. I want people to walk away from me and still remember me a year later because of the presence that they felt when they met me.

My goal is to be the woman that I want my son to bring home, and the lady that my daughter wants to be when she gets older. The woman my husband is proud to show off, and the lady that is constantly admired. I strive to be successful, a goal-digger (so that I can afford my own gold!), and an amazing role model. But, in the meantime, I want the luxury of not always having my hair perfect, wearing sweatpants out of the house, eating ice cream out of the carton, running out of milk when I’m preparing cereal for breakfast, and yelling when I get upset at someone. I have like 6 and a half more months until I turn 30- I’ll use that as the marker to start being a lady on a daily basis.

Tootles! -xoxox

Is “Multitasking” A Superpower?

As a mom, working a full time job, having a small business, and being someone who is determined to have a personal life, multitasking has become a superpower for me. How in the world do I manage to accomplish all of these things? I’m still trying to figure it out myself.

I always joke with my boyfriend that he is the worst multitasker in the history of the world. He cannot talk and text. He will literally stop mid sentence to write a  paragraph long text (which can sometimes take him 5 entire minutes) then pick back up where he left off. Actually, now that I think about it, he has very good memory. Meanwhile, I can carry two plates full of food, 2 cups of juice, and have my phone in my ear while walking from the kitchen to the dining room. Or, I can be on the phone while writing an email and researching simultaneously. I told you, I’ve created a superpower. (cheesy emoji face)

How do women do it? How do we compartmentalize our brains to focus on more than one thing at a time? I’m actually asking you- how are we able to get this done; do you know? I find it amazing how many things I am able to accomplish in just one hour. As we speak, I am writing this blog and working endlessly to make my son go to sleep while having 2 text conversations and planning in my head what I will be making for dinner tomorrow (I’m thinking tacos). It is an ingrained ability that I have.

Thinking back on the personality test that I took a few days ago,  it might have something to do with that fact that I am particular to details, or that I like order and control in my life, or I may just have OCD. I’m pretty sure that the latter has a major role in it somehow. Now that I have children, I am convinced that you cannot be an effective parent if you don’t know how to juggle things. I can carry both my son and my daugher, my purse, and a bag or two in my hands from the car into the house. I’m talking up the stairs, keys in hand, unlocking the door, walking through the porch, and opening the door to the house and putting everything down on the couch/floor. Now THAT’S a skill! And I can cook with my son either on my hip or dragging on my leg. *Kanye shoudler shrug* You do what you have to do.

The downside of effectively mutlitasking? I don’t remember crap. I do so many things at once, that I can easily but unintentionally overlook something or just completely neglect it. I might’ve done so to the kids a time or two. Don’t tell anyone, please! I’ve tried leaving notes for myself, leaving papers on top of my keyboard where I think I can’t overlook it, sent myself emails- you name it, I’ve tried it. And I still manage to forget something. I think I’m just old. My pregnancy brain never left- my mind is permanently pregnant and I can’t undo it. That could be the very reason why my basment is filled with all of these parts but I cannot figure out where exactly in this time machine these pieces are supposed to go…

All of this to say that I am superwoman because I can do multiple things at once and get a whole heck of a lot of things done. Just don’t be mad at me if I forget or overlook something. Wait, what was I talking about again?…

Tootles! -xoxo